• marvindp6

Create The Person In You That You’re Looking For

Updated: Oct 14, 2020

If you know what you want to accomplish, you are ready to start the process of preparing yourself to attain that goal. You start from the inner reaches of your being, namely your character, paradigms, and motives.

If you want to be trusted, be trustworthy. If you want to be happy, avoid negative thoughts. Whatever you want to be, start first with your character. Greatness comes from within.

Making and keeping promises to oneself, no matter how small, is key to keeping and making promises to others. Bigger things come from smaller building blocks.

Deal with what is in your control and release your perceived hold of what is not. Your energy is better spent on things within your power. You are in charge of how you deal with or react to situations. Exercise caution in reacting when you are angered or disappointed, because you may not be in control of your emotions. It is always better to withhold any comments or reaction until you have had adequate time to digest everything.

You become the person you want to be by developing successful habits. A habit is defined as a behavior pattern acquired through frequent repetition. Stephen Covey expands this definition as the intersection of knowledge, skill, and desire. You cannot develop a habit without all three being in play at the same time.

Proactive vs. Reactive Behaviors

Each one of us has individual responsibility for our own lives. We are either proactive or reactive in our behaviors.

Highly proactive people recognize their own ability to choose a response. They do not blame circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior. Their behavior is a product of their own value based, conscious decision, rather than a feeling-based product of their conditions.

Proactive people focus on things they can do something about in a positive, enlarging, and magnifying way. A focus on fewer priorities makes us more productive. When multiple objectives exist, concentrate on one at a time. Strategic items, in contrast to day-to-day issues, require larger blocks of uninterrupted time (week, month, etc.).

Their physical and social environment largely affects reactive people. Reactive people build their emotional lives around the behavior of others, empowering the weaknesses of other people to control them.

Reactive people focus on other’s weaknesses, environmental problems, and circumstances outside their control. This results in blaming and accusing attitudes, reactive language, and increased feelings of victimization.

No one hurts us without our consent. The decision to be hurt by someone else or not is ours.

Avoid stating things in negative, reactive terms. The danger of such language is that it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Embedding negative thoughts into our subconscious mind separates us further from our positive goals. We may want certain things that are good, but if we direct our thoughts against them, we are in conflict. Obviously, we want our thoughts to be in direct alignment with our goals.

More than likely, most people fall somewhere between proactive and reactive. We realize some things are out of our control, but in other cases, we have not. In these cases, only part of our energy is focused on what we really want. Some energy is being wasted on things that cannot be changed. In fact, in the larger spectrum of life they may not really matter at all. Imagine how much farther and faster you can get in the pursuit of your dreams if you used all this energy to your benefit.

Look good to improve your chances of success

Studies show a direct correlation between looking good and success in life. A Harvard study explained that people who feel unattractive, as judged by themselves and their peers, tend to suffer from feelings of loneliness, rejection, and isolation.

If dressing up makes you feel good, do it, and be confident.


Philippians 4: 6-7: 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

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